You try to focus but your focus is not there
It's funny how things change in just 7 weeks.
7 weeks ago, I was full of enthusiasm and motivation, doing my best to apply whatever I have learnt in school and taking initiative for nearly anything and everything. I went to my first internship workplace with a single thought "To do my best in whatever I can do, no matter how bad/hard it is. So that I can learn."
Week by week, I was given exactly what an intern was technically supposed to be given -- Manual Work/ Shit Work. However, that didn't get me down cause I believe that I could make at the very least a little change in the company. I was the first to come to work/arriving on the dot, giving suggestions for optimization and improving procedures, expressing new ideas for the company, doing a self initiated proposal identifying the flaws and justifying why it is not beneficial for the company...(Whatever a motivated & enthusiastic human would do)
I won't say my efforts didn't make a difference, because they did. Processes were improved, productivity/efficiency levels increased, time taken decreased, problems were solved. But there wasn't a sense of satisfaction. I came to learn, what have I learn exactly? This was the question that pondered me many of times, got my emotions and thoughts running wild. At the very least, I applied the things I learnt in school which wasn't too bad.
Just then, I got an opportunity that would make my internship worthwhile -- a trip to the mother company in Germany. But it wasn't as easy as it seems, considering different factors: Human's attitude/ perception & hierarchy mostly.
I would say I was quite affected by this and I started thinking, my motivation started decreasing. I placed emphasis on things that are worth it in my perception, I go to work for the sake of going. I utilize my time properly so that internship wouldn't make me stupid.
Status: Happy-Go-Lucky
7 weeks down, 6 weeks to go.
I'm more than half way done. *self pats*